Merry Xmas everyone. Let us give thanks to the aliens who left the radioactive glowing baby known as Jesus Christ and let the three rich men to his birth place with their hypnotic rays. Nacbar Voneekra and Merry Xmas everyone.

Peace on Earth
And Goodwill toward all!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

So not safe for work... or the kiddies... or people of faith... or with good taste.

That said, it's pretty funny.

Thanks a lot, Vault of Buncheness!

Happy Holidays, y'all!

www.deusexmalcontent.com/2009/12/real-reason-for-season.html

E and I just got home from the very busy grocery store and I think *knocks wood* we are READY for the holidays. Here is our tree:


We are hoping Santa puts some good cat toys in Fred and George's stockings, as they have both gained THREE POUNDS since their last check up. Ugh. Beasts. They don't seem to notice their rotundity, and think they should still be able to fit in their basket (clearly they are mistaken):



Oh Fred. If only you would be INTERESTED in cat toys. *sigh*



Hope you're all enjoying the holiday season!

Peace and love,

Jo

The Creature With Fangs Elfed yesterday.



My Beloved Husband Elfed yesterday.



Queen Louise Elfed yesterday.



And I did, too.



A most merry time, indeed!

Revision Tip #23

I rarely have the image systems of my books in mind when I start writing. But by the end of the first or second draft, some image (symbol for Eng lit majors) has cropped up and I realize that I can riff on that symbol throughout the book to tell the larger story. In a subtle way, I hope.

In SPEAK, it was the image of the tree. There was only one mention of it in the early drafts. When I realized the power of it, I wrote in all the art class scenes, and made the tree into a year-long project for her.

WINTERGIRLS was interesting. The first paragraph of the first draft of the book was this:

"The crows stalk me, wings folded neatly behind them, hungry yellow weighing my soft spots. They circle around me once, twice, three times, claws scarring the stone floor of the church.

I curl up on the frozen altar. They flutter close, black feathers filling my mouth and eyes and ears."

I really don't know where that came from; I just wrote it down, plus a bunch of other stuff. The reference to the "frozen altar" is what got me thinking about ancient religions and mythology, which in turn led me to ponder if there was a mythological story within Lia's story. Of course there was: the story of Persephone. That became a central image system for the book, with references to pomegranate seeds and the death that is winter, along with mother/goddess figure at her wits end, trying to pull her daughter back from the grasp of hell.

(For the record - that opening paragraph wound up migrating to page 264. It fits much better there.)

Is there a small detail in your draft that could be expanded into a central image system?

It's that time again - the "giving" season. As folks who've been reading my LJ for a while know by now, each holiday season I post a reflection about the nature of presents and giving. I originally posted this entry in 2004, but as with It's a Wonderful Life, old friends keep requesting it and new friends have yet to see it.

Although I know many of you have seen this article before, I still enjoy putting the sentiment out there each year. If you've never seen it before, read and enjoy; if you have read it, enjoy anyway. In this hectic season, these thoughts about the deeper level of giving can be inspirational.

Happy Holidays, folks!



------------------
The book on my pillow inspired a sudden burst of pleasure. Oh, look - a present! My disappointment when I recalled that I'd left the book there myself that morning didn't completely diminish that momentary excitement. And that, of course got me thinking...

I love surprise presents - both giving and receiving them. Many of my favorite memories of childhood involved unexpected gifts: models, books, toys, even a homemade cardboard headquarters for my GI Joes. My parents were great about leaving such presents around my room or on my bed, and I brought that tradition with me to my love and living situations. In all my partnerships, I've been known to leave surprise gifts on my lover's side of the bed... and they've reciprocated the same way. I've done it for my roommates, too, and many have done as much for me. During my relationship with Francesca, I would travel across the country to visit my beloved, enter her house when she was at work, and find cards or little gifts welcoming me "home." Of all the things I miss about a romantic relationship, I think that feeling of joyful surprise - and the ability to inspire same - for a close partner is one of the elements I miss the most.

That sensation of gifting or being gifted by surprise is so wonderful, yet so easily lost in this season of consumption and expectation. As we go into the dreadful splendor of Christmas/ Hanukkah/ Kwanzaa/ Solstice/ Yule/ Whatever, it may be worth reflecting on the nature of gifts and the pleasures they can bring.

----------

The verb "present" means "to give, to show"; related to "presence," which means "to be in attendance, to be there." As a noun, present infers both the act of giving and the act of being there. To give someone a gift is therefore to be in his or her presence, even if you're not physically... well, present. Seen this way, a gift implies that you are with your loved one. We don't often think of gifts so consciously, but the manners around giving and receiving (and the appropriate gratitude and display of gifts) keep this connection alive, if not always acknowledged.

In our society, however, this expression of sharing has become a lynchpin of social and economic survival. The act of giving has become both chore and expectation. It's like demanding "You be here NOW!" and having that same command placed upon you. It can be joyful, but some of the spirit disappears, along with the element of surprise, when one's presence/ presents is EXPECTED rather than surprising. And let's not even go into the socio/economic factors. These days, it's treason NOT to go into debt each December. And across the counter at the store where I'm employed, I see very little joy in giving.

Maybe this is one reason the obligation to give can be so onerous. When we're EXPECTED to provide our presence/ presents, that demand can rob the gift of joy. Spontaneous giving and receiving, on the other hand, is powerful. It says "HI! I'm here for you!" in ways no words can match. Surprise gifts are often more appreciated than lavish ones; I know that in my memory the model kit I found beside my bed one morning when I was seven just because holds greater value than expensive gifts I've long forgotten. (That being said, lavish presents CAN be fun, of course...) It's sad that our consumerist society has linked spontaneous expressions of affection with the old winter tradition of mass survival and the modern tradition of buying everything in sight to keep the economy afloat. The dread we feel about holiday shopping and the drama of family gatherings reflects, I feel, the shift from true presents/ presence to expected obligation (from ob - ligare, "to bind").

So - how might we appreciate and share true giving, now and every season?

1: Be spontaneous. Give for no expected reason. Leave gifts or cards on your loved ones' beds, in their mailboxes, on their desks just BECAUSE. Any time of year. These don't have to be lavish - my aforementioned lover left me greeting cards, used books and small scented soaps. It's the surprise that matters, not the cost of the gift.

2: Be memorable. A clever or insightful gift says "I am thinking of you" rather than "I spent money on you." And it will be remembered long after rich toys gather dust.

3: When giving or receiving gifts on expected occasions, recognize that each a gift carries a little bit of the giver with it.

4: Be grateful. Remember that a present symbolizes showing up in the recipient's life. Acknowledge that, and be present in return. 

That  book on my pillow may have been my gift to myself. For although I left it there unintentionally, it inspired me to think - and to share - more consciously about giving.

Wassail!

*hugs*

All work in the Forest today will grind to a halt as we enjoy the ceremonial viewing of Elf. And we might even make spaghetti with maple syrup.






I got to thinking about my family's tradition of setting out rice pudding for the julenisse. Nisse have been around long before Christmas celebrations. English words that describe them as elves, or gnomes; I've seen "pixie," too. If properly cared for, nisse will watch out for your farm animals, your house, and your barn. If you don't take care of them, they will cause all kinds of mischief on your property.

Nisse are low-maintenance creatures. All they require is a bowl of rice pudding (risengrød) set outside your door or in your barn on Christmas Eve. We've always done this faithfully and I think our nisse appreciate it.

But as the sun was setting yesterday and I was lighting candles in honor of the solstice I realized that the nisse have been around a lot longer than Christmas celebrations. Ack! Have I been disrespecting the nisse all these years? They are ancient creatures... do they wait, forlorn, on the night of the winter solstice, their tummies grumbling, while the Big People go about their ignorant business? And when the pudding FINALLY shows up on Christmas Eve, do they call up the other nisse and complain?

So last night I put out rice pudding for them. And I will again on Christmas Eve. You can't be too careful with nisse.


Revision Tip #22

Are you sure that you've chosen the right point of view for your novel?

Take your favorite chapter and rewrite from a different POV; shift from third to first, or first to third, or if you are bold and way smarter than me, experiment with the second person POV.

Or.... (and.....) fool around with the tense structure. If your story is told in present tense, rewrite that favorite chapter in past tense. If you've written the whole thing in past tense, try out that chapter in present tense.

What's the point of all this mucking around? It helps you see your characters and the Story from a slightly altered perspective.

When we were little, one of our Christmas traditions was going to the Kellerhaus to pick out an ornament. The Kellerhaus (owned by my dad's step-uncle) was this very fancy store that had all kinds of beautiful ornaments, candies and an ice cream parlor where you could make your own sundaes. It also had incredible toys you never saw anywhere else. There was one room that had just ornaments and we three kids would stand there and turn in circles, studying each one before we made a choice.

This is the earliest choice I can remember:



She's pretty faded and not very fancy-looking now, but I remember loving her the moment I saw her. I have other ornaments from those years hanging on our tree, too. And each year when I hang them up, I think about those days when my mom took us on that special annual excursion. I can smell the store—scented candles and newly made fudge and ribbon candy. I can feel the excitement as we got closer to the ornament room, and the longing as we browsed the toys we couldn't afford but loved dreaming about anyway. And getting a sample of fudge from our uncle Seth if he was there. And the box of ribbon candy my mom always bought, that we'd have to wait to eat at our Christmas Eve party as we tried to stay up until midnight to hear the animals talk. So many memories. So many.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Write about a holiday tradition you remember from your childhood. If you have a photo, share! :-)

Good Solstice, everyone!

I feel like calling your main character Rudolph today. (Humor me.)


Revision Tip #20


Don’t make it too easy on Rudolph.

Your story should not be a tale of the desires of Rudolph. It should be the thwarted desires of Rudolph up until the very end, when finally, FINALLY, things go right, tho' not in the way he originally thought they would.

For every desire, there should be an obstacle. Every step on the path leads to another detour.

Review your manuscript and make sure that poor Rudolph runs into obstacles over and over again. You fiend.


Revision Tip #21

1. Record yourself reading your manuscript aloud. The whole thing.

2. Listen to it with your manuscript in front of you (I am most comfortable with the printed-out version at this point.)

3. Pause whenever necessary to make notes on what needs fixing. This is when I find repeated words, awkward phrases and dropped plot points.

4. After a marathon listening session, go back in and finish all the repair work.

Dear Representatives of the Citizens of Our United States,  

What is wrong with you?

 

For the past year, we – your voters, your supporters, the human beings you are charged by oath and paycheck and some would say even by God to represent – have told you our plight.

Over one-third of us, perhaps as many as one half of us, literally cannot afford to get sick. Cannot afford to be hurt. Cannot afford for our children or parents or spouses to get sick or be hurt. For those of us without built-in benefits like those you yourselves enjoy, illness or misfortune can and do destroy everything we have built. Everything we save. Everything we might hope to accomplish. The costs of even a minor illness are so monetarily high that most of us face bankruptcy or a lifetime of debt if and when such misfortunes strike.

The companies paid to help us with such costs do nothing of the kind. Instead, they deny coverage, cut coverage, raise the costs of coverage without any practical or legal limitations. These “insurance companies” take as much as they want, give as little as they please, and pocket the difference as profit. In no other field, save gambling, are such practices legal.

We have cried out for reform. And you have failed us. We have come to you in person. In letters. In phone calls and protests and petitions, we have told you what we need.

And you have ignored us. Instead of reform, you seek to bind us by law to the very companies that exploit us. Some of you block reform and call your deeds “patriotic” or even “Christian.”

Others among you make “deals” that gut reform until all that’s left is a huge gift to insurance companies and another burden for us.

Here’s the real deal. You have failed us. You have betrayed us.

You are profiting from the suffering, the debts and even the deaths of the human beings in your care.

The “contributions” – and let’s call those transactions what they truly are, BRIBES – you accept from the insurance companies are bought with the money, pain, suffering and lives of We The People.

And We The People have told you as much to your faces.

What by all that’s holy is WRONG with you people?

How can you face yourselves in the mirror?

How can you get out of bed?

How can you pray to whatever you call God?

Those of you who consider yourselves “Christian” – how can you square your actions with words and deeds of the Christ? How can you square things with the Man Upstairs if you can’t even square them with us?  

And how dare you claim to represent us as you hang us out to dry?

Do you even have an answer?  

Because so far, all we’ve heard are excuses, slogans and lies.  

Beware of echoes and doppelgängers!

Maybe I am the only writer in the world who suffers from this bad habit. It makes me crazy. I do it in every blasted book, no matter how hard I try to be aware of it early in the process and avoid it.

I always create characters that are identical, both in their core characteristics and the purpose they serve in the book.

(I may have mentioned this earlier this month, but it is such a big pain in my writing butt, I must rant about it again.)

I spent all day yesterday and the wee hours of this morning extracting one of those characters from my book, and turning over many of his scenes to a different fellow who – I can now see with the blazing clarity of humiliating hindsight – should have been driving those scenes in the first place.

It was a bloodbath, I tell you.

How can you perform this radical surgery in your manuscript?

1. List all the characters.

2. Define – using only a few words – that character’s relationship to the main character.

Examples: comic foil, trusted friend, villain, complication, love interest.

3. If (like me) you have two or more characters that serve the same purpose, get out a magnifying glass and sharpen your scythe. Is it possible to have one of the characters take over scenes from the others?

Example: in the early draft of SPEAK, the character who is now called Heather was two separate girls. Each girl was a “sort of” friend of Melinda for a few months. Each friendship died. Their personalities were a bit different, but not in a strong enough way to affect Melinda’s interactions with them. By melding them together, the story was cleaner.

I am crossing my fingers that the work I am doing this weekend will have the same effect.

Dear Mr. President and members of Congress: You fail. Merry Krampusmas to you all.

I love revising!!!

Here are what some of my notes on my editorial letter for PEARL look like:



And here's what my average manuscript page is looking like:


And here is what my inspiration for daring looks like, thanks to my awesome class who gave me this for an end-of-semester present:



:-)

Must stop now to attend my son's holiday party, where there will be more singing! Yup, it's still all holiday tunes all the time at chez Jo's.

Have a great weekend, everyone!!!

Sometimes people forget that I wrote PROM because it is not exactly a depressing book. In fact, it's pretty funny, if I do say so myself. (If I had dread, depression and death in all of my books, I would not be a healthy person!)

So it is with great joy that I announce that PROM has been nominated to the 2010 Popular Paperbacks List, in the "Change Your World or Live to Regret It" category!!

School Library Journal has posted their annual collection of Christmas Memories written by children's authors and illustrators. This year's essays were written by me, my buddy Deb Heiligman, Barbara McClintock, Lauren Myracle, and our National Ambassador for Young People’s Literature, Jon Scieszka. Enjoy!

Revision Tip #18

Are you stuck?

Have you tried all my plotting tips and dialog wisdom and adverb scorn and still you are stuck?

Try this.

1. Make yourself some comfort food.

2. Put on music that relaxes you.

3. Snuggle up in a warm, cozy place with a pen and a pad of paper.

4. Write a letter to your main character. Tell her everything that is worrying you about the story in general.

5. Pause to eat a bit. Make some tea or hot chocolate.

6. Pick up pen and paper again. Tell your character why you are specifically worried about her. Ask her what is going on in her life, in her relationships that you don't understand. Ask her advice about how to help her move forward.

7. Write down what she tells you.

8. If you can't hear her voice, then it is time to put that manuscript away for a while and work on a different story. But I am pretty sure you will hear the voice, so be chill and write.

Wonderful news of positive change from GLSEN (the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network)! After one year of their hard-hitting "Think Before You Speak" campaign, teens attitudes about anti-gay language have significantly shifted.

From the GLSEN website: "For instance, findings from a recent survey conducted by the Ad Council in 2008 and 2009 of teens aged 13-16 suggest that a higher percentage of teens in 2009 think that people should not say "that's so gay" for any reason (38% in 2009 vs. 28% in 2008) and a higher percentage also report "never" saying "that's so gay" when something is stupid or uncool (28% in 2009 vs. 18% in 2008).


"In the Ad Council's nearly 70-year history of creating campaigns to raise awareness and change public opinion and attitudes, we don't often see shifts of this magnitude in just over a year," said Peggy Conlon, president and CEO of the Ad Council. "We're looking forward to building on this success with a new series of PSAs and online tools that will help to further raise awareness and engage teens online."


Here is one of the videos that made the huge impact:



I adore Wanda Sykes. Just saying.

GLSEN is now started their second-year of education and awareness about the devastating effects of anti-gay hatred and language. Their website has information for parents and educators, along with all kinds of stuff you can put on your blog or website, plus polls, videos and lots more. Please take the time to check it out nd pass the word. (Thanks to School Library Journal's Extra Helping for the heads-up!)

Revision Tip #17

I keep thinking about the slightly different approaches Barry Lyga and I have to writing dialog.

I forgot to mention one part of that.

Your audience might affect your decision about how you structure dialog.

Many people are not sure who their audience is when working on the early drafts of their novel. Nothing wrong with that. But as you revise, you need to know who your reader is. The way you tell a story to olders teens will be different than the way you tell it to middle grade students. At least, I hope it would be.

My theory is that teen readers (ninth grade and above) have enough reading and life experience under their belts that they do not need as much visual action details accompanying dialog as younger readers do.

(This could also account for part of the difference between the Lyga and the Halse Anderson Schools Of Proper Dialog; Barry only writes for teens.)

The danger, of course, is that your middle grade (or younger) reader will get bored if you layer on the descriptive action with a heavy trowel.

Try this: Pull out only the action words from your dialog scene. Here's an example from a page I am working on now:

Character A speaks.
Character B gives reader visual description of Character A.
B speaks.
A reaches into sack and speaks. Hands apple to B.
B grabs apple, bites and speaks (note: he hasn't eaten for more than a day). Apple juice runs down his chin.
A removes hat, nods and speaks (introducing self)
B swallows, wipes faces on sleeve, speaks
A speaks
B speaks
A speaks
B chews and thinks
A speaks

I know - it's kind of boring to look at it that way, but by putting it under the microscope, I can make sure that the action details are an integral part of the story. They reinforce the fact that Character B is hungry, that he needs help, and that Character A might be a person he can turn to. It also balances a debt, because B helped A out of a bind in an earlier scene.

Bonus tip: since action in dialog scenes needs to be minimal and precise, it is a great opportunity to hone in on that perfect tiny detail that says volumes about the characters, setting, or conflicts at hand.

Sometimes things can start to feel so overwhelming. Even discouraging (hello superintendent from Kentucky). And then something like this shows up in your e-mail and you realize, well, you realize all that other stuff doesn't matter so much:

Hello,

My name is X and I live in X. I am 16 years old and I have never really had luck when it comes to reading. I can never just sit down and read a book. In English class we had to choose a book for a project and luckily I came across your book! And for once, I sat down and read every single word!!! I have never read a book like this; at first I was a little hesitant. But, I just told myself, Okay I have to do this. But, after 15 pages or so, I could not stop reading! I just wanted to tell you that I really love your book! I am, for the first time ever, looking forward to reading.

I can't stop smiling.

:-)

:-)

:-)

See? I was serious.

:-)

:-)

I also found out today that Jumping Off Swings was nominated for the Milwaukee County Teen Book Award! There are 15 finalists and I seriously cannot believe my book is on the same list as the other books on that list.

:-)

:-)

OK. I'll stop. :-) (sorry)

Yesterday was.... let's not go into it.

Today is here and that is all that matters.

If you are still shopping for a winter holiday, read "Cheese and Crackers Never Changed Anyone's Life" and then finish your shopping at Indiebound.

There now - wasn't that simple?

Congratulations to Melissa on this WINTERGIRLS video - the project earned her a 100 in her class.

Revision Tip #16 (yes, I know it should be 15, but yesterday really was something of a mess and it's easier this way. Do you remember the "Bruce" sketch of Monty Python? Remember how there was no Rule #6? This is the same thing.)

Where was I?

Right, Revision Tip #16

Revision is the perfect time to brainstorm.

Really.

Brainstorming is not a one-and-done part of the writing process. Not the way I see it. After that messy first draft, I usually have chapters that feel empty or out-of-place. I mentioned the way I use huge sheets of paper to organize my chapters. Here is another technique.

1. Identify the critical chapters in your novel. Which are the ones that contain The Really Big Stuff?

The Really Big Stuff chapters will usually be separated by chapters in which the action unfolds in a slightly less intense way. Think of your novel as a wide river that your reader needs to cross. The RBS (Really Big Stuff) chapters are small islands in the river. The other chapters are either stepping stones or bridges that get the reader from one island to the next.

2. List the Stones & Bridges chapters, then prioritize them by how alive they feel. What is the chapter that feels the most flat - the chapter (or chapters!) you are secretly wondering if you should cut?

3. Don't cut them yet.

4. There is no Four.

5. Brainstorm as if you were starting from scratch. For each of the flat chapters, dream up ten different ways the action could unfold. Go ahead - be outrageous. I dare you. Sometimes thinking way outside the box is what you need to jolt your writer brain into clearer storytelling.

6. (Please note; there IS a Rule Six, Bruce!) Pick one of the ten and just freewrite the chapter over again. How does it help the reader understand the characters better? How does it move the story forward?

7. Rinse. Repeat. Send me questions.